When I first lost my job, my biggest fear was centered around how I would survive without a place to be from 9-5 every day.
For the first few days of unemployment, however, this fear flew out the window because AAAAAAIIIIIIIEEEEEEE FREEDOM!!!
As time went on though, I realized that I just cannot function in a healthy way without a structure to my day. Places to go, regular activities, etc. As the end of the year came upon me, I began to feel that it was time to go back to working full time. Even if it wasn’t a dream job, there is a lot to be said for a place to go every day, the stability, the routine, the steady paycheck.
Here are the clips from my movie montage from this period of my life, set to an upbeat YOU CAN DO IT! song, probably by a rocker chic.
Things I Did While Unemployed
Took a yoga class at 11 am on a weekday with…a bunch of other people without jobs? Or stay-at-home moms whose kids were in school? Or freelancers? Or actors? Actually probably just actors.
I walked down to the Lower East Side one March afternoon to find the bakery where my favorite cupcakes were baked. I bought four.
I went on lots of trips.
I called lots of people to see if they wanted to catch up.
Did lots of physical therapy and fixed my knee and ankle!
I reorganized my closet, donated all the clothes I don’t wear, gave away some shoes, threw out a bunch of other useless things.
Did the same with nearly every room in my apartment.
I went on exactly one audition. It was awful. I didn’t go on another.
Watched my dad get better, watched him stand up for the first time in 9 months, watched him take his first steps. Like a baby! BUT BETTER!
I thought about things I wanted to write.
Sometimes I made time to write those things.
I thought about jobs I might want to pursue long-term.
Went to lots of regular therapy to fix…my brain!
I made lists of projects I could tackle.
I got my car inspected.
Learned how to become a savvy grocery shopper.
Stuck with Italian lessons for awhile.
Was a Maid of Honor! Wrote a Maid of Honor speech! Threw a wholesome bachelorette party! Walked down the aisle in a church in front of lots of people! CRIED FOR DAYS.
Became addicted to Friday Night Lights, watched the entire series from beginning to end. Cried when it was over because all my ‘friends’ inside the television were gone.
Spent a lot of time falling in love with my boyfriend.
Wrote and shot a short webisode with my cousin Tom in LA.
Things I Did Not Do:
Edit that webisode. It’s still on my video camera.
Become a professional figure skater.
Go to the DMV. (I put this on my To Do list every week of last year, meaning to get a new picture taken and renew my license which expires soon. As of this post publishing, I still have not gone to the DMV.)
Write a book. Or anything of substance.
Enjoy a lot of the free time I had. After awhile, I started to get restless and the vastness of the free time started to overwhelm me and I rarely had the money to do all the things I wanted to do.
Continue Italian lessons. I ran out of funds.
Find out the meaning of life.
Etc. Etc. Etc.
But, that’s pretty good, yeah? A fulfilling year! I didn’t make any crazy decisions, I didn’t really figure anything out. But more importantly maybe, I spent a lot of time doing things I really enjoyed, being with people I loved and I was able to have space and time to work on a bunch of messy things.
And you can’t really ‘figure anything out’ or make any permanent life decisions until you start wading through the murkiness and stirring up some things underneath.
Tomorrow! One last (important) blurb about my time as an unemployed person! And then we move on! To 2012! And stuff on the horizon which, huzzahhhhh!