* I bought a Groupon for 10 sessions of bootcamp in the park near my apartment a few months back. It was $20 for 10 sessions and I am unemployed and even if I wasn’t, that is only paying $2 for someone to kick my butt. I recently realized that I should use it up as soon as possible because I am not going to want to work out IN THE PARK, OUTSIDE when it gets cold outside.

And oh yeah, I forgot to tell you that it’s at 6 am.

SIX O’CLOCK YOU GUYS.

During my first lap around the track, the stars are out above me. By the time it’s over and I’m stretching, morning has arrived, the sun glowing over everything.

It is a seriously great way to start the day. And then it’s only, like, 7 am and I’m wide awake and bouncing into The Roommate’s room with coffee going WAKE UP WAKE UP WHAT SHALL WE DO TODAY!? And he’s like, um, work, some of us have a job? And rolls over and goes to sleep and that’s the problem with being wide awake at 7 am. THERE IS NO ONE AROUND TO HANG OUT WITH.

So then I go back to bed. Problem solved!

I really like it though! Bootcamp in the dark/sunrise was such a great $20 investment!

Well. Except for the instructor who this morning was like let’s do 1400 planks followed by 10,000 crunches with this medicine ball thing and after 3 sets of this, he asked for another and I simply said “No”.

You can do that, right?

I can. I paid two whole dollars for this. I can do or not do whatever I want.

* I bought pumpkin spice coffee at Trader Joe’s. It is DELIGHTFUL.

* My iPod from 2007 finally died and I was so sad to be without my music because I LOVE MY MUSIC! Showtune Playlist, let’s DO IT! So then my boyfriend generously gave me his old iPhone to use as an iPod except…my Macbook is from 2006 and the operating system was never upgraded because I barely know what that means so it wouldn’t recognize the iPhone.

So I ordered a new operating system for $30.

I joyously tried to install it.

Lo and behold, an error message popped up that said my little 2006 Macbook did not have enough RAM to support the new operating system.

Haaaaaaaaaaaaaaa.

So I took a deep breath and called Apple and was all hey you guys, how can I get more RAM? And they said SUPER EASY! Take it to the Apple Store and pay $200! $100 per gig of RAM! You need two!

And then I picked up my Macbook and threw it out the window.

No, I made a genius bar appointment and then emailed my friend Laurie and was like CAN YOU BELIEVE THIS? RAM FOR $200 WHAT IS RAM? And she linked me to a website that showed a video tutorial for how to install your OWN RAM. You just need to order RAM on the internet!

So I did.

(Remember, this whole story is about how I desperately need to be able to listen to the original cast recording of multiple Broadway shows. And maybe some of Sarah McLachlan’s “Surfacing”. WHO REMEMBERS HOW GREAT THAT ALBUM IS?)

Guess how much RAM costs on the internet?

$27 including shipping.

$200 MY BOOTY, APPLE.

The RAM showed up yesterday (without antlers, which super disappointed me even though I should’ve expected as much) and The Roommate installed it for me! Because he is a computer genius! As soon as he did it, we installed my new operating system which works perfectly. And then I got on the internet and found out Steve Jobs died.

I…woah.

iWoah.

I actually took the Macbook into the Apple store anyway today because IT STILL WOULD NOT RECOGNIZE THE IPHONE and I won’t tell you what they told me and how they fixed it because I’m still embarrassed THE POINT IS, there was a memorial already outside on Fifth Avenue with flowers and notes and I just took a breath and thought man, that guy changed the world. And also my whole entire week because dang if it doesn’t take a LONG TIME to get some music back in your life THANK YOU STEVE JOBS FOR YOUR VARIOUS INVENTIONS.

* This list is getting long. My brain is really busy.

* On Tuesday afternoon, I saw a man on a bicycle in midtown STEAL A WOMAN’S BAG off her person and take off down the street. She stood there screaming after him some not nice words that my mom doesn’t want me to write on here because Father Bob reads this blog and he would NOT APPRECIATE those terms.

Anyway, as this lady is screaming at what a @#%@#!@#!@# this thief on a bicycle is, everyone is staring and feeling so helpless and just as I thought he was going to get away with it, A COP CAR SHOWED UP and blared its sirens and took off following the bicycle thief and THEY WENT ON A CHASE and the thief turned into a parking garage to try to escape and THE COP CAR FOLLOWED HIM and there is no end to the story because they drove out of sight and I have no idea if they caught him and I know you hate me because this was so anti-climactic but it was completely out of a movie and so random and so New York that I just loved it. HOW EXCITING AND HILARIOUS!

* I told my therapist today that I thought that story was exciting and hilarious and she kind of cocked her head and was like “Um, maybe not for the lady whose bag got stolen?”

Ugh, therapist. Stop pointing out how heartless I am.

* I just got off the phone with my dad and he told me that he joined a gym, asked my mom if he could get an iPhone and ordered a pumpkin ale at a restaurant and they lined the rim of the glass with cinnamon-sugar and he THAWT DAT WAS DA MOST INCREDIBLE THING.

The End.