More On The Car That Is Sucking My Wallet Dry
On Sunday night, I started my car and waited for PCG to hop in the passenger seat. As he did so, the car sputtered and died. I tried again. It started no problem. And then, death.
I attempted to drive it home and realized that everything was fine as long as my foot was on the gas pedal.
However, if ever we were idling at a red light? It would stall. And let me tell you, driving in Queens means there’s a red light every three feet so BOY THAT WAS A FUN RIDE HOME.
I had to fight back the urge to scream/cry/recite the book of Job/etc.
We made it home safely and I promised PCG I would look into getting it fixed. And by ‘look into’, I meant that I would text my sister’s boyfriend, Matt, a car aficionado to see if he could take a guess at what was going on.
That was days ago.
Today I met PCG for coffee.
PCG: So what happened with your car?
Me: What about it?
PCG: Did you find out what’s wrong?
Me: No! Of course not.
PCG: Well, did Matt have ideas?
Me: I don’t know.
PCG: You don’t know?
Me: I didn’t text him.
PCG: Did you call?
Me: Nope.
PCG: Why not?
Me: I don’t have his number.
PCG: Sooo, what you’re saying is that you’d rather not know.
Me: Right.
PCG: And since you haven’t used the car in a few days and there’s no urgent need to know, you’re just going to let it sit there as long as possible and ignore the whole situation, aren’t you?
Me: Um. Yes. That would be how I deal with things.
PCG: And this is effective?
Me: ENORMOUSLY.
My guess: easy fix. An air hose probably fell off. At least that’s what always happened when I had to drive my car with a foot on the gas at all times.
I second vaccum/air hose leak. Does your car shudder when it stalls? If it is, it’s probably just because the engine isnt getting the right gas/air ratio and the pistons arent firing correctly. Check it out!
My guess is that the ThermoPlastic Olefin gnomes that subsist in the fascia are interacting poorly with the on board diagnostics gremlins that infest the oxidiser-air inlet system. Do a centrifugal regenerative cooling incantation with a high velocity nozzle. If a collimated jet of super-enriched carbonaceous plasma forms, all you have to do is sublimate the torque curve, calculate the Carnot cycle and reciprocate the compression ratio. You’ll have yourself a thrummin’ combustion chamber faster than you can say Felix Wankel!